I Can’t Tell If It’s a Good Idea to Sleep With the Married Man Pursuing Me

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He not only had an amazing body but a great personality as well. I was honest when I met him that I was looking for something more than just sex, and he led me to believe that was what he wanted, too. Between mind-blowing sex sessions, we ordered in, played video games, and watched movies — couple things but without the label. But when I tried to get him to go to a show or out to dinner with me, he refused.

How long should you wait to allow sex? In fact, the iconic box series Sex and the City attempted to tackle the question roughly two decades ago. The goal is en route for give you a chance to appraise the other person before hopping addicted to bed. Right off the bat, it's clear the rule isn't perfect—particularly after it comes to not wanting en route for seem overeager. Our sex-negative society has programmed us to slut-shame people who have sex on the first appointment, as though their eagerness to clean says something bad about their appeal. There's something to be said designed for not waiting too long to accomplish it. You don't want to advance a ton of time in a new relationship, only to realize you weren't sexually compatible to begin along with. Plus, if you put it bad for a while, you run the risk of losing your sexual anxiety and entering platonic friendship territory. After that is the third date really after most people start having sex anyway?